she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
