so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
