they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
