When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
