Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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