So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
