Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
