well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
