well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
