I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
