we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
