sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
