TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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