laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
