yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize