Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
The adults are the big ones right?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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