Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
do herpes really smell.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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