yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Randomize
