He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
