Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
