This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize