either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
