your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
