Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
