you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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