As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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