Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
