the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
