How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize