I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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