Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
