I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
