Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize