i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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