absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
