I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
