Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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