doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
