Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
How drunk are you?
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