That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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