hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
In other news, I just burned my penis
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize