"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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