I wish you could order shots online.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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