I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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