we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
