I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Can you bring me the toilet please
They are going to name an STD after you.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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