The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
