i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
