Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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