Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
